I, too, was a follower in the ways of To-Do list writing. I’d carefully record every task, item to pick up or drop off, and note I wanted to remember for the day. Despite my relentless attempts at completing my list each day, I found myself inevitably running out of time and bumping things over to my next day’s list until it eventually became more of a menace of guilt than the useful, productive tool it was when first employed in my daily routine. To put it lightly, my precious To-Do list was stressing me out.

As if I didn’t have enough worthless junk in my purse already, my To-Do lists of old would accumulate and randomly appear in my bag, my car, on my desk, or in the dryer after subjection to the wash cycle in the pocket of my pants. On each encounter, I’d look at the list and kick myself for things undone, unfinished or forgotten. No matter how old or how new the list, there was always at least one thing that never got accomplished. I’d group the notes together hoping for a day when I could spend some time reviewing them and hopefully catching up. Good thing I didn’t hold my breath, because that day never came.
Upon accepting the futility of my To-Do list system, I finally stopped writing them. To compensate for my lack of lists, I began training my brain to remember the things that I could absolutely, in no way, shape or form, forget each day. Yes, I still felt guilty for not being superwoman and conquering a daily list of objectives, but I rejoiced in the fact that I was at least remembering the critical things that could not be omitted from my day’s activities. That’s when it hit me-I’d been doing things all wrong. I had it backwards! Instead of making a To-Do list each day, I should have been making a Not-To-Do list!
For example, my typical To-Do list looked something like this:
To-Do List:
• Drop daughter off at school
• Put gas in the car
• Do x and x and such and such at work
• Review Joe Blow’s resume
• Interview Joe Blow
• Pick up husband’s dry-cleaning during lunch
• Pick up daughter and drop off at home
• Finish x and x and such and such at work
• Walk Delilah (my very spoiled Pomeranian)
• Pay light bill online
• Go by grocery store to get taco seasoning
• Cook tacos for dinner
• Take daughter to dance class
• Post jobs online while husband watches TV
• Try to take a bubblebath
• Go to sleep by 11 pm.
Editor's note: we ate KFC for dinner that night.
By the end of the night, here’s how much I actually got accomplished (and still lived):
Actually Accomplished To-Do List: • Drop daughter off at school
• Put gas in the car
• Do x and x and such and such at work
• Pick up daughter and drop off at home
• Walk Delilah (my very spoiled Pomeranian)
• Pay light bill online
• Take daughter to dance class
• Post jobs online while husband watches TV
Everything else on my To-Do list was rolled over to the next day or never done at all.
So what does this mean for you? Let’s see how my original To-Do list could have been a reasonable (attainable) Not-To-Do list and much less stressful on me and my sense of guilt.
Not-To-Do List
Don’t:
• Leave daughter stranded at school.
• Run out of gas.
• Get fired by not doing what needs to be done.
• Miss out on a potential placement by not making time to interview Joe Blow since I can review his resume while I talk to him.
• Acquire a late payment fee and scolding from husband by forgetting to pay the light bill online today.
• Inconvenience my husband by leaving his dry-cleaning unretrieved.
• Deprive Delilah of her beloved walk, even if it’s just around the yard and back.
• Starve family.
• Waste my money by letting Kayla miss dance class.
• Worry about jobs that need posting by getting them online while we watch TV.
• Go to bed too late.
• Forget to take a bubblebath tomorrow since I’ve earned it by remembering not to do everything on my list today.
If you made one right now, what would be on your Not-To-Do list? Would it be much more manageable than your tedious list of tasks glaring up at you from your notepad or that receipt from your pocket with a smudge of chocolate on it? Think about it and share your Not-To-Do with us by leaving a comment below.
On that note, I’d be sinning if I forgot to share this wonderful rendition of Breaking (Waking?) Up is Hard to Do, performed by the doo-whopping wonders, The Laryngospasms. The Laryngospasms are a group of five nurse anesthestists that spend most of their time providing anesthesia to the residents of Minneapolis & St. Paul, MN, USA.
Don't worry; they haven't given up their day jobs! Their music uniquely blends operating room humor with the golden oldies of yesterday. In their own words, "We can modestly say that we know of no group quite like ours.”
That makes two of us!
Happy Not-To-Do whopping,
Heather J. Ali
President
Heather Ali & Associates
Phone: (800) 991-6288
Fax: (888) 399-8474
Email: hali@heatherali.com
Web: www.heatherali.com
